Divorce has been long described as a dilemma that mostly affects younger couples. However, this narrative has shifted in recent years as more and more older couples are getting divorced. This idea of older couples getting divorced has become known as the gray divorce phenomenon. To give some perspective as to how much of an increase there has been in divorce among older couples, only 8.7% of all divorces in 1990 involved couples of 50 years of age and older, whereas in 2019, this percentage has grown to 36%. However, what is it that is causing older couples to get divorced? In this article, we will explore some factors that influence gray divorces, in addition to the unique challenges that getting a divorce later on in life presents.
Why Are Older Couples Divorcing?
There are several factors that can be attributed to the increase in gray divorces in recent years. Here are a few reasons why the divorce rate has been shifting:
- Changing Social Norms: One of the main contributing factors to the increase in gray divorces is changing social norms. Perhaps one of the most significant of these changing norms is that the stigma surrounding getting a divorce has greatly lessened over the years. More and more people are acknowledging that if you are unhappy in a marriage, it is ok to end it. This diminishing stigma has made it far more socially acceptable for older individuals to end marriages.
- Empty Nest Syndrome: Another contributing factor that may play a role in some gray divorces is known as empty nest syndrome. This term can be used to describe the emotions parents feel when their children are all grown up and moved out of their house. The absence of children in their home can sometimes reveal underlying issues in their spousal relationship that were previously masked by the demands of parenthood. This can cause some couples to re-evaluate their marriage and sometimes part ways.
- Increased Life Expectancy: One final reason why gray divorces are becoming more common is that life expectancies are also increasing. Since people are generally living longer and healthier lives than they did 30 years ago, older couples are realizing that they still have many years ahead of them. Therefore, if a marriage no longer meets their needs or expectations, they are more comfortable leaving as they still have a long life ahead of them.
Unique Challenges of a Gray Divorce
While many of the reasons why couples may get a divorce are more or less similar across generations, getting a divorce later on in life can pose some, perhaps, unique and unexpected challenges and obstacles. Some of these include:
- Financial Security: Getting a divorce later in life often means dividing retirement savings, pensions, and other assets that were accumulated over a lifetime. Sometimes, this can be financially devastating to those who were primarily dependent on their partner’s assets.
- Health Concerns: The stress of a divorce can often exacerbate any existing or underlying health issues, as well as lead to new ones. Therefore, being that older adults are more vulnerable to health issues, their physical health is more at stake in particularly contentious divorces.
- Emotional Well-Being: While getting a divorce can be emotionally taxing to individuals of any age, the effects can be more severe when long-time partners part ways. Older couples especially may feel isolated and alone, particularly if their social networks revolve around each other.
Getting a divorce, regardless of what time of your life, can be an incredibly difficult decision and a significant life adjustment. To help alleviate some of the stress of filing for a divorce, it is advised to seek legal guidance from a divorce attorney who can help you throughout the process and ensure that your rights are protected.
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