No one really wants to think about divorce, but the statistics show that there’s around a 30% chance that we will face divorce in our lifetimes. Divorce is an extremely challenging period for most couples; they have to let go of the mutual dreams they had for their future, divide assets and figure out how they will parent moving forward. While there’s nothing that can really make the pain of divorce go away, there are a few things you can do to help minimise your suffering. If you’re really struggling with the divorce, it can be a good idea to find divorce lawyers in Sydney to ensure the assets and custody rights are handled by a professional. Here are my top 4 tips for dealing with a divorce:
1. Get Professional Help If You Need It
Going through a divorce can be one of the most traumatic experiences of anyone’s life: your entire life may feel like it’s been flipped upside down, even if you were the one who originally initiated the divorce. Be open to seeking professional help whenever you feel you need it. It may be hiring a lawyer to help protect your assets or a counsellor to help discuss some of the feelings you’re experiencing. You may need to get extra help in the home such as cleaning and meal deliveries to help relieve you of the daily pressures so you can focus on your family and your grief. What you need will vary from person to person, but don’t hesitate to get help when you need it.
2. Be Kind
It can be hard to be kind if you’ve been hurt: maybe your ex partner was unfaithful, lied, or did something else to damage your trust with them. While no one will expect you to want to continue your relationship nor to become friends, the very least you can do is be as kind as possible. Try to make the process as easy for you both so you can move on faster and get onto the next stage of your lives. Don’t forget to be kind to yourself. It’s easy to question yourself if your partner has chosen to leave you or hurt you in other ways, but it’s important to be kind and realise that often other people’s actions are more a reflection of where they are in life, than where we are.
3. Keep It Off Social Media
I’ve had some friends who have aired out their dirty laundry and I just feel it’s not the right place: after all you may have friends and family members in common that probably don’t need to see what you’re thinking deep down. I think a small, brief announcement can be an easy way to spread the news without going into details. You don’t know how you’ll feel in a month, or a year, about the situation, so it’s best to say as little as possible while the wounds are still fresh.
4. Look After Yourself
While it may feel like your whole world has been flipped upside down, the best thing you can do for yourself is to take time to care for yourself. That might mean continuing with your gym routine, meeting your friend for a weekly coffee catch up, going to the spa, going out to a bar with friends or getting a new hair cut. Whatever makes you feel your best and cared for needs to be a priority at this time. Take some time out each week to invest in yourself and to take the best care of yourself that you can.
Divorce is a challenging time with a lot of emotions flying around. Use these tips to keep yourself as centred as possible, so that you can move through the divorce process as well as is humanely possible for your own mental health.